thread I rarely have strong urges to own things
But this is different

permalink That is rather swish
permalink Nah, french
But quite close to the border
permalink Badum
permalink Capitalist pigdog.
permalink I ordered a xiami redmi 6a for MrsJam
on Tino's advice. It's excellent. £75 from aliexpress, which included a case and screen protector, and then I was stung £12 on import duty (£8 of which was the post office charge for charging me £4).

The screen protector included this gem in the instructions:

permalink I do like it when
someone halds me lirmly
permalink hurray, let the instagramming begin!
( at least, that's what my gf does with her phone).
permalink peak
permalink Nah, maaaaate
This is peak Straya
permalink In my experience
permalink Ha ha
Holy fuck
permalink This.
permalink Meth
Hell of a drug
permalink There was something like that
in one of our local antiques emporium; cost £700
permalink Yeah they paid €900
thread We're doing some work for Fortnum + Mason
They keep sending us loads of product for lighting tests and mockups. Another bloke with a sacktruck of big boxes turned up today... with another few hundred quid's worth of premium edibles.

Mostly we only need the packaging, but they always send full ones and don't want them back.

Office snacks are most excellent at the moment...
permalink giles works there, and is constantly moaning
about how most of their packaging is unreadable. (eg gold on yellow)

plus they keep forgetting to have any staff on the shop floor, but plenty in management.

but he does bring the occasional freebie home that is most excellent.

the insane amount of money they take is mind boggling, someone will stroll up to the till with a little gift box of 8 tea bags for £12 and say.. i need 50 of these and pay in cash.
permalink It's nuts.
My colleague who runs the Fortnum's jobs currently has a fortnums package the size and shape of a fucking milkchurn under his desk... in Fortnum turquoise. I haven't even looked to see what's in that.

We have eaten literally hundreds if not thousands of pounds of biscuits, chocolates, etc, etc...
permalink if you see an octagonal package of nuts in chocolate
about 40cm across.. rrp about £60

grab it and just run out of the building.... those were amazing.
permalink Mmm...
permalink No I don't.
permalink that's how bad their management is
they dont even tell people when they have employed people
permalink We sold them a shedload of honey a few years ago,
when we'd had a very good harvest. They paid us £8 each for 76 250g jars we normally sold for £4.50 per jar, and they sold them for £13 each.

Paid for a very nice weekend in a seriously luxurious spa in the New Forest. Which was nice.
permalink sweet
permalink geddit?
... sweeet. honey....
permalink Sounds like
a honeytrap to me!
permalink Stop trying to
bee funny...
permalink if we ever do meet up
and you have some left i'd like to buy an assortment
permalink This year's harvest was minimal,
due to losing both colonies last winter, and not getting new ones till June. But yes, we'll put a jar aside for you.

In Other News:- https://www.theguardia...
permalink that reminds me
Londoners / anyone. What's a top cliched tourist attraction / thing to do in London? Like the Tower, or Eye, but not them. Somewhere you could kill a couple of hours before lunch.

Trying to plan a thing and my mind has gone completely blank.
permalink Transport museum
in Covent Garden
permalink I'd like that, not sure the other party members would
good idea though, ta.
permalink Open top bus
Greenwich market
Boat down the Thames
London Dungeon
British Museum
permalink Dungeon, that's a good one.
probably be Jan/Feb, so indoors makes sense. Didn't specify that.
permalink Boat down the Thames
is also indoors. And you can drink on some of them IIRC.
permalink cool, ta, I'll keep them in mind
permalink I'm guessing you;re taking your mum
and your child as well maybe.
permalink oh yeah, family trek
it's going to be a massive ballache. I'd been thinking zoo, but that might be pretty brisk in (say) February, but then I guess it's entirely reliant one the weather all year round. we'd thought afternoon tea somewhere which is why F&N reminded me (not at those prices!). It probably doesn't really matter, and we'll be cabbing mostly to save walking, just went blank thinking about other options. Dungeon is a good idea, and it's by the aquarium, so maybe.
permalink I liked afternoon tea at Charlotte Street Hotel

Drinks in the restaurant bar at the Tate Modern gives you a good view of the Millenium Bridge and St Pauls

Zoo is massively expensive as well, not sure about the Dungeon - maybe keep an eye on Groupon.
permalink It seems you can also get afternoon tea in the Globe

which is right by the Tate Modern.
permalink How old is child?
That may be a constraint...
permalink I did of course read "how old is child?"
In the style of "how is babby formed?"
permalink Me too!
'How girl get pragnent?'
permalink 4, so it will be
but we've done it before and she'll behave enough for a non-very posh place. The whole thing is very vague so far, just need to start punting ideas about.
permalink Too young for the dungeon then...
They recommend 12+...

permalink fuck it, we'll just go to Ely!
I'd not got as far as looking properly, will have a proper research at the weekend.
permalink Go to Ely
Go down the pub with his Witchyness, all sorted!
permalink you can go to yeah olde mitre pub in holborn and
still be in ely parish.

permalink that looks like the sort of pub
I could get involved in.
permalink just avoid worktime lunches & going home time
as it's full of cunts
nearby is london silver vaults your mum might like that
also knights templar jdw nearby for grandness/child friendly &
The Seven Stars for unkept originality

permalink pretty standard for london that though!
the silver vaults looks cool.

I've drunk in that JDW. Although the Shakespeares Head on Kingsway was were I spent several hours when I worked in Holborn. That and the White Hart at the top of Drury Lane. That was a hole in the 90s.
permalink huzzah!
permalink i've met plenty of 11 year olds i'd gladly lock in a dungeon

(not in a fritzelly way)
permalink If you are doing the dungeon,
Borough Market is almost next door for lunch.
permalink natural history museaum
madame tussades,
the london dungeon

or the john soane museum is nice
a wander round borough market
go up st pauls, or the orbit, or the sky garden of cocktails at duck and waffle.

or a go on the dangleway

open top tour
permalink st paul's is a good idea
we did the science museum a few years ago, that was excitingly shoddy.
permalink the zoo is also good of course

the V&A is also worth a look.

or go to the pub
permalink I was thinking zoo (see above)
because if the weather was nice the park would be fun potentially. Madame Tussauds would just be creepy.
permalink Comedy suggestion:
permalink see, I'd also like that, but I'll never get anyone to agree to it
we went to the Dome earlier in the year, perfect opportunity you'd think. Not a chance.
permalink It's not very exciting.
And there's bugger all on the other side.
permalink we're country folk
all of your big london is exciting.
permalink the route 15 still runs old fashioned routemaster double decker buses and goes from st pauls
past big ben iirc.

permalink that would probably be pretty fun with just the child
or absolute hell on earth. hard to say.
permalink Both Tates.
White Cube too.
permalink I suspect a gallery won't hold much interest for the child, although I may be doing her a disservice
might take the wife down separately at some point though, we haven't done tate modern for years.
permalink wallace collection
wellcome collection
portobello / wanlthamstow / old spitalfields market
chiltern open air museum
v&a childhood museum
geffrye museum
(The Viktor Wynd Museum of Curiosities)

child friendly with various locations eat at -
masala zone
stepney city farm
permalink cool, good list, ta.
Masala Zone, all over that.
permalink I am jealous
I wish I got food freebies.
permalink Good news everybody!
They've made the duty free maze in Gatwick North Terminal even longer and more twisty
permalink Meanwhile... now I finally get lunch.
Long morning. Which involved blasting up to B&Q at Tottenham Hale in a Zipcar to get about 40m of timber.

Driving in London is a frustrating pile of shit, isn’t it? I don’t often do it, and rarely around here (Old St).

Anyway. A quick burger and it’s time for some joinery.
permalink should have tried to do it in an uber
permalink had an interesting night yesterday
was heading home ready to go out with chums, when a random teenage girl next to me in the street had a massive seizure (literally like someone flicked an off switch, one second walking, the next a rigid plank) and faceplanted into the concrete, seriously injuring her face

spent the next 20 minutes sitting with her and on the phone with the emergency services as she passed in and out of consciousness and after seizures...then finally the ambulance arrived, paramedics took over and I wandered off home to wash off the blood and got to the restaurant just in time for cocktails. Which all felt a little surreal

poor lass, starting your weekend by discovering you're epileptic
permalink Oof, sounds familiar
How horrible, especially on the street. Well done you though.
permalink Blimey
Poor lass. But excellent first responding. Nice work.
permalink Kinnell, good job
you were around! Good work sah.
permalink Happened to a cow orker
Turned out not to be epilepsy but something called an Arnold Chiari malformation.
A fun condition where the brain tries to grow down the spinal column or some such!
permalink Well done!
thread I have a job interview this morning
I am bricking it
permalink good luck
I believe in you, and you have this. If not, its all good learning.

Go you! you spangly wonderful bunch of atoms.
permalink is it with a housebuilder?
if so keep doing that.
permalink Or a professional lego modeller.
permalink *applies*
permalink good luck!
in Cambridge?
permalink Haslingfield
think it went OK?
permalink Hope so.
Crossing all the polymers for you.
permalink no idea, did it?
Haslingfield would be alright, easy cycle.
permalink Fingers crossed you nailed it.
permalink if I haven't
I've got one with a different company (in Bar Hill) on Tuesday. Or rather, I've got that interview before I'll hear from this one.
permalink Ooh, choice!
I had that once. The small company nearby with the easy commute, or the big prestigious place with much better pay and a pain in the arse commute. Money won, obvs.
permalink today was a start up
money should be roughly the same, the start-up would only be guaranteed for one year so would be a risk versus stability but probably not as exciting at the big company
permalink Hopefully the one in Bar Hill
isn't for Tesco?

Also, good luck, obviously!
permalink it's the company
that doesn't make pizzas
permalink I guess that means something to those in the the know
To me of course, that means almost all companies...
permalink hope it went well
*crosses ALL the bits*
thread Morning all, how was your weekend?
I had an interesting (if very tiring) 24 hour trip up north to see my dad get ordained as a Deacon.

It was a day of firsts - the first time there has been an ordination in the village church, the first time the current Bishop of Durham has done an ordination outside of Durham Cathedral, and the first time I've gone to a church on a Sunday.

I did not have a religious upbringing at all - so it's been an interesting time since my Dad started down this path.
permalink Crikey
How rare!

I mostly ran around a lake and then drank beer
permalink I drank wine
now I have a headache.
permalink Hmm, well
Have you tried drinking more wine?

Warning: this may only be a temporary solution
permalink I tried painkillers
and that worked so I stuck with it.
permalink argh my legs
just signing up for the Paris Half Marathon (le Semi) because I've clearly not learned my lesson.

They offer a premium registration package including photos etc called...."My Unforgettable Semi."
permalink I mean you could just go to Paris on holiday,
you don't have to find an excuse.

And please don't show us photos of your semi.
permalink my brother lives there
and him and his missus are both doing it, and so I obviously have to do it so I can beat him

except now he's bloody gone and signed up for a full marathon, so now I have to do one of them too. jesus. He'd better not take up ultras
permalink didn't you have a load of trouble with your ligaments or something?
you should try more low-impact excercise.. like strolling to the pub
permalink yeah but turned out I just have crap feet
went to a podiatrist, got some trainer inserts and all my injuries and pains disappeared overnight, 10/10 would recommend
permalink Yup, this
Haven't used orthotics, but never used to be able to run, but then I started using decent trainers, suddenly* not a problem. Also heartily recommend doing other stuff for core stability etc, like yoga

*and not sudden at all, gradually built up distance etc.
permalink in my brief stint of running
going to one of those places that put you on a treadmill and then recommended shoes was a massive difference..

i overpronate apparently

I've gone and bought one of those smart trainers for my bike that allow me to cycle around a virtual course with a lot of people called brad... it's quite good so far though, certainly half an hour on that is worth an hours normal cycling.
permalink Is that Zwift or however you spell it?
That gets very confusing on Strava when people do that
permalink Yeah.. iim "never the twain shall meet"
I don't mix zwift with the other stuff.

It's good though,

permalink Hey, why's that bloke I know suddenly cycling round Innsbruck
Also, not on any roads...ah, OK.

Very odd
permalink Yeah they did that for the world championships
It's back to the fictional world now it seems
permalink shoes can only correct a tiny bit of overpronation
I needed the full orthotics, I'm 6° off true apparently. podiatrist says it's very common but you get away with it until you get to 35/40, then all your other tendons stop being able to compensate and suddenly you're plagued by injuries

incredible the difference it makes (both in terms of pain and speed), though they do take quite a while to get used to
permalink Fairly muff, it's horses for courses, whatever works for you!
Which is what makes me mad about people* who are massively evangelical about a shoe they love. Just cos it works for you, doesn't mean it will for me.

*especially those worshipping at the altar of zero drop!
permalink yeah, each to their own, I mean I couldn't do 5km without being in huge pain
if you're running marathons up and down serious lumps 17 times a week then I doubt you have any need

hark at you and your correctly aligned soles
permalink I wouldn't go that far
I do overpronate a bit, which is why I use Brooks GTS Adrenalines for road running.

Doesn't seem to matter as much on trails, so have used all sorts of shoes. Although I probably do need a new pair of comfy long distance trail shoes. The Saucony Peregrines have ALL the grip, great for slippery winter trails, but not that comfy after a while
permalink Their Xodus shoes are pretty good
although the soles on my last pair didn't do too well on rocky/rooty trails. If you can find them, Dynafit do some excellent trail shoes. But try before you buy as they have some weird sizing issues.
permalink Can't you just try to
outdrink him?
permalink I hope it goes well
you don't want to have a disappointing semi
permalink Excellent, have fun
Hope you enjoy running on cobbles!
permalink Up north on
weds for 3 days with the lovely Mrs Witchy, first time since March. Much pub/caff food, ale and some excellent comedy on the Sat night. Thurs night in my old local with mates, Fri night was The Nightingales in one of my favourite Gateshead boozers, a non-stop hour of blistering tunes.

Sunday appeared to be spent mostly on trains or waiting for trains, huzzah for TrainBeer(tm).

Managed to walk 15 miles just around town and across the river a few times!

Back to work with a bump this morn.
permalink I discovered an amazing new ingredient,
and used it to make a splendid tea last night:-
permalink we made macaroni cheese
and went to a mates for a very boozy foody barbecue.

permalink I bought macaroni cheese
from Cook. It was ok.
permalink there's a chi-chi turkish near me that does mac n' cheese sides
with its grilled meat platters (?!)
where has this love for m&c come from?
permalink is it ketchup? good ingredient ketchuip
salt too. try that.
permalink We had a debate the other day about whether "salted" is a flavour
After someone described pretzels as salt flavoured

To me that seems like an ingredient rather than a flavour.
permalink I reckon ready salted
is a state of being for crisps, not a flavour. salt and vinegar is a flavour. maybe you're right, I'm not sure salt is a flavour as such, but I wouldn't want to have to sign off the law that says either way.
permalink Ready salted is because they've got salt added
They wouldn't taste like that without the salt on the outside.
permalink as anyone* who's sampled
salt'n'shake before the wee blue bag is opened will testify.

permalink I'd forgotten about salt'n'shake!
they were a bit rubbish.
permalink I keep buying them from
time to time just to remind myself how poor they are apart from the last few which are SALT.
permalink sounds interesting
is it hard to find?
permalink Waitrose,
permalink quite one this weekend, all three of us are shagged out so did v. little
I finally managed to get out on my new bike again though, that's rather nice.

my dad got signed up as a lay preacher, I think he got bored after retirement.
permalink I took miniluminator and my mum to Dundee on Saturday
And we went to the new V+A.

Big picture architecture is great. Close-up, the detailing is shit. Especially outside.

Content is fab.
permalink Awesome about your dad!
The CofE seems to be heading into some interesting times.
permalink Also, it would seem that the birth of my second child
has rendered me incapable of getting any body's name right on the first attempt.
permalink I am not religious
But I think I'd be praying to all available god's if this happened to me
permalink The problem with that sort of thing
Is it's all fine, assuming everything goes right, but any problems whatsoever and it's good night Kiev. See also fuckwits driving at 200 kph.

Also, the god's what?
permalink Next door neighbour
permalink I like this one:-
permalink Tabazan!
Not Geoffrey from Rainbow!
permalink Or Charles Aznavour
for that matter
permalink or the bloke wot
drew Judge Dredd.
permalink Indeed
Had no idea one of the principal artists was Spanish!
permalink All can say is
He's no Geoffrey!

/edit Bungle's not taken the news well (shamelessly stolen from reddit).
permalink Looks like someone
forgot the safe word
permalink haha
permalink do you think he's making ammends
for siring you?
permalink hahhahaha
thread Any of you lot been to
Ljubljana? Kind of thinking about it for NYE. We went to Berlin last year, and had a *magnificent* time, maybe too magnificent, as we're a bit scared to go back and try to do the same stuff again (fireworks, drink, food, drink and fireworks) and it won't be as good.

And dancing with hippy chicks to *the best hip hop ever* on the U-Bahn at 3am.
permalink Baby.
Mother & baby both well.

This isn't particularly public yet but this place doesn't count.

Edit: A bishop emailed me congratulations.
permalink excellent
permalink Huzzah and congratulations!
Fantastic, well done Mrs 'Jam! And you too, obvs.

Now, names. Let's get some suggestions going.
permalink they've called 'im Jude
says so in the post. Said so before I replied.
permalink I presumed he'd dismissed it and was sourcing
permalink it is a bit obscure

(and I expect I'm about the 475th person to say that so far)
permalink I think he was just being
permalink No,
I was just being drunk
permalink so you were a bit
permalink Fuck yeah.
I barely remember writing that.
permalink My italian friend said "we don't use that name in italy because
of the one from the Bible"
Me: Nah, that's Judas. Different name. *googles* Oh.

So there are two followers of Jesus called Judas. The good one is known as Jude to distinguish him from the bad one.
permalink It's the Law
permalink Fuck 'em, and their law!
permalink Excellent news!
Love to all the jams, especially MrsJam!

Jude is a good, proper name. Nicely done.
permalink big fella
well done everyone.
permalink Congratulations!
permalink Splendid
permalink Congratulations
glad everyone is happy and well.
permalink years and years ago
so it's probably changed. Nice though.
permalink I've been to Slovenia but not ljubljana
But heard very good things

And we liked Slovenia
permalink just ran my first half marathon
and last night I submitted the final version of my PhD thesis to the bookbinders

this has hence been far too productive a weekend and so I am going to the pub and taking tomorrow off to sit and stare into space

not as productive as creating a whole new human being though, that shit's crazy
permalink Good effort, on both counts
Always nice to resubmit the final final version of thesis.

Spent a while on Saturday running round and round Blue Lake in Rotorua. Was hoping for ten laps, and my first proper ultra, but given lack of training, not surprised got sore after 7 and decided not to break myself. Plus there was drinking to be getting on with. Cracking weekend though, with great mates.

Hats off to the crazy idiots that kept running through the night to finish the miler. One guy with 15 seconds to spare! Nobody took the claw home for 200k though. Great (if mental) event , a race, but not really. Mental organisers, with great shit talking too!
permalink Also, wonder if Double Brown* guy finished?
Fair dues to the guy, he was going for 24 laps, 24 hours, 24 beers. Chatted with him on lap 2, at about 9.30 am. Crazy but very entertaining dude!

*terrible, terrible beer. But ideal for this sort of thing, as light, lowish alcohol
permalink Christ.
how long is a lap of the lake?
permalink 5.5 km
Short enough that you think it should be easy, just long enough to make it hard. Mostly fairly easy trails, although a few slightly technical sections, and some bastard stairs. Bit less than 100 m of climbing a lap.
permalink Respect!
One lap would do me just fine. 7 is bloody good going!
permalink I was really hoping to get my first 50 km run in
But, to be fair, I haven't been doing enough long training. And definitely decided it wasn't worth breaking myself over. Cracking event though, cos you keep seeing people each lap, often different ones, and there's always someone to have a natter to.
permalink Blimey
5k I can manage... and am trying to do it more often. I used to regularly do 10 years ago, but it'd kill me right now.

50? Nutter.
permalink I managed just under 39k
But my right Transport for London* was getting well sore.

*can never remember what TFL stands for. That little bastard muscle right in your hip flexor region
[edit] tensor fasciae latae apparently
permalink what's the one at the outside top of your calf where it joins the knee joint?
that's the fucker today, nearly stopped me crawling to the pub
permalink Could be the very bottom of the ITB?
That is often a real fucker
permalink yeah, it's right there
to be fair, I did really push myself today - literally beat every PB from 1km to 13m, so expected some severe problems, came off quite lightly I think

furthest I'd run before today was 11m and as soon as I passed that mark my legs just died
permalink I'm assuming that should be 11 km!
And I find the imbibing of a number of muscle relaxing beverages afterwards is a crucial part of the recovery process!
permalink nah, 11 miles
thought that as a training distance that would be more than enough and the energy of the day would get me through the rest

I was wrong, those last 2 miles really really hurt

beer and curry in some quantities has helped
permalink Ah, makes more sense
I just don't think in miles any more. Read it as metres
permalink Also
you have to dodge an angry Peter Mullan at the top of it
permalink Ha! Thankfully it wasn't that lake
Which is good for a number of reasons, not the least of which is that a single lap of Lake Wakatipu would probably be 100 km or more
permalink I wound up doing 10k
paddleboarding, with a group off the internets. Including the entertainment of going down and back up The Backs on a warm sunny Saturday afternoon.

Only got one random tourist wet with a misplaced paddle stroke... And only a bit.
permalink I can't be the only one to stifle a knowing giggle at
"Only got one random tourist wet", can I?
permalink Nope.
permalink I knew what I was writing
permalink have a pint
down the ol' Moist Tourist later.
permalink Nice one.
It's going to be years before I can take a day off and use it to sit and stare into space.
permalink Hah, yes I know that feeling.
Congratulations though :-)
permalink You missed out at least two
sets of fireworks from that description of NYE in Berlin...
permalink there'a richard ayoade travel thing where he goes there with izzard
might be useful

neverEver try to recreate the past