thread I'm tired and bored.
Having finished some necessary but not very inspiring work and sent it out.

I think I'm going to slope off early in a bit and have a pint on the way to pick up ickleuminator for the weekend.

Anyone got fun plans?
permalink i'm going to brighton to try out my new burkini
on that damned pebble beach
permalink I am going to a friend's daughter's 18th birthday party tomorrow.
I'm then going to the Hope Show on Monday and having a BBQ which is generally open to all comers, although I know of no-one who's actually coming.

edit: White chocolate Lion bars resemble 1980s white dog turds.
permalink It's a bit far for me to pop in, tbh.
I hope you don;t end up on your own with the meat sweats.

All white chocolate is basically solidified child-sick anyway.
permalink I'm going to put a large piece of beef brisket on the grill on Sunday afternoon,
which should mean it's ready some time on Monday, so I hope some people come.

edit: or perhaps I should do it with a leg of hogget?
permalink either would work...
go with the brisket and get some woodchips in there to smoke the fucker.
permalink have you moved into your new haus?
you could always stick up a sign and snag all the tourists into having a bun-o-meat
permalink Well it's the start of the excitingly pagan Wakes Week tomorrow,
so there may well be tourists to be snagged.

permalink cor!
that looks like an ideal english summers weekend.. you picked a great place!
permalink Most of the excitement is the weekend after. when the carnival floats go past my house, I think...
... and I have nowhere to park.
permalink I thought you had
nowhere to park anyway ;)
permalink mmm hogget
preferably studded thoroughly with anchovies and garlics
permalink Anchovies? What madness is this?
Garlic, rosemary and salt.
Sadly I can never touch raw meat until it's cooked. As a youth, I used to weep in butchers' shops.
permalink Turn vegetarian,
or find a good local farmer and get the fuck on with it.
permalink It's a Withnail & I quote.
I do not share the sentiment
permalink Ah :)
permalink trust me on the anchovies, it's an italian thing
they melt into the fat as its roasted and add even more big meaty depth to it, doesn't taste at all like you're probably thinking
permalink there used to be a narrow street in norwich
that had several butchers on it. Right in the middle of town. The stench of raw meat and bleach was so grim. urgh.
permalink we're up visiting my parents
and going to see my sister who's just had a baby. so far it's bloody chaos.
permalink we had some friends with a 3-month old round last night
so probably mostly sitting in blissful silence
permalink I have just been to the local garden centre
and bought some potting compost, some grit and a couple of succulents. Oh and a little trowel.
Not doing anything tonight (so far), tomorrow going to the matinee of Bugsy Malone with friends and then spending the rest of the day / evening eating and drinking. Sunday will probably involve a pub lunch. Monday will be enjoying the last day of my time off before work again on Tuesday.
permalink I've been doing testing for most of this week, which I really don't like.
It's unplanned, then I'm frequently drawn in to a conversation about whether it's worth fixing or not, etc, which makes it tedious.

Nothing on tonight, family gathering tomorrow as my uncle and his family are over from new zealand, on Sunday we're off to a friend's church's summer do, and then nothing much on Monday.
permalink No fun plans, except painting the back wall.
I am extra miserable today though if that helps.
permalink nice to see you round these parts anyway!
permalink I had perhaps the darkest thought I ever thunked this morning.
"I cannot kill myself this close to my daughter's birthday"
permalink To clarify, before you are all supportive and shit,
I am not ever going to kill myself.
permalink I get it
I think it but I don't do it.
permalink plans were for a pamper day
before husband went for a turn.
They were cancelled, but now he's able to look after himself and better than expected, I'm off up town for afternoon tea.
That will do.
thread if you were wondering
a fish finger and camembert toasted sandwich IS NOT a good idea
in fact it's rather rank

what recent food experiments have turned your stomach?
permalink Not quite that,
but I had a chicken kiev sandwich, and quite badly burnt my lip due to hot juice seepage, the burn is still visible.
Not recommended.
permalink mmm
juice seepage. Top Peel session.
permalink Two day old kedgeree
which hadn't been in the fridge.

The bin still smells of it.
permalink jebus
that was brave/suicidal!
permalink I had one small mouthful,
just to check.

It wasn't good
permalink I don't even
know what kedgeree is.
permalink It's essentially a ree.
Made with very early-season kedge.
permalink You're not alone,
French people haven't heard of it and can't pronounce it.

It's rice with smoked fish and egg and parsley, traditionally eaten for breakfast/brunch.
permalink sounds quite nice,
as long as its fresh, obvs.

Hang on, that's one ingredient away from my cod-in-parsley-sauce-onna-rice-bed concoction.
permalink You have it cold.
permalink Doesn't it have a light curry flavour in it as well?
It's Indian originally, I think.
permalink It typically does. Curry, possibly turmeric, coriander... other variations are about.
And yes... descended from Indian things.
permalink it doesn't have to be served cold.. it's a perfect sunday brunch meal
with a bloody mary.. not sure about the origins but it has curry coriander and parsley in it (i don't think indians are that fond of eggs so it's probably some scottish bastardised version of an indian meal).

but eating any leftovers containing rice is dodgy
permalink He read a recipe,
he didn't just make it up.
permalink Loads of variations around... it's not a set-in-stone classic.
I like it warm more than I do cold, to be honest.
permalink at least if someone offers me it
now I'll be able to accept rather than go 'muh' :)
permalink If it was Scottish, we'd have battered and deep-fried the fucker
and served it with chips.
permalink oh i thought it was scottish
maybe because when i first ate it it was a smoked kippers & salmon version
permalink I think it was some non specific Victorians
who went to the Raj, and said "that's alright, but I bet we can improve it by changing it completely"
permalink a bit like 'coronation chicken'
permalink I suspect you are bang on
Scots may have been involved in that case, but it definitely hasn't been properly Scottified.
permalink Cheese and fish rarely go together well...
A fish finger sandwich is a fine thing though.
permalink ♫when you're making a dish
out of cheese sauce and fish
that's a Mornay♫
permalink I hate the fact
that I love this.
permalink *polite applause*
permalink it's not mine
can't remember where I heard it, but it's been stuck in my head for years. And now yours.
permalink Thank you.
It is also the one clear exception to the cheese and fish rule.
permalink haha!
hungry now..
permalink I've got a recipe somewhere for a haddock pasta thing that's got loads of cheese in
and is very nice
permalink a local french restaurant does a version of carbonara
that uses smoked salmon instead of bacon.. it's yummy
thread Eep. This week our CEO 'left the building' which means
that none of the original directors of the company that bought us a few years ago are still around. Interim CEO in place.

Given that we used to be a mom'n'pop company I'm not used to these upper-tier shenanigans, am I right to be fucking terrified right now?
permalink Exec level
Is a merry-go-round
permalink higher up I've been witnessing that
over the last few years but this bloke knew the companies and what we on the periphery do. The new lot won't have a clue and because we're not 'core' I'm worried.
permalink whoops.. i had a feeling that might happen
sounds like they've done a brexit
thread I have 10 holiday days left to use before March next year.
We're away two long weekends in September, and I might book a day off in December so I don't have to travel to York at commuter time. I suppose I could book some before Christmas, but we're closed between Christmas and New Year, so don't need any there.

What I'm saying is, we need to book some holidays (or otherwise take time off if there's no money available). Where shall we go early next year?
permalink NB I've checked, and I can't carry holiday over to next year,
which is a bit annoying as we'll definitely be having a long holiday next year.
permalink I often do a wintery long weekend somewhere
in this country in February - Landmark Trust properties are really cheap Jan-Feb.
Lots of booxe, fires and roasted meat to alleviate the dreary winter.

Unfortunately, I am using up much of my remaining leave going to California for a long weekend in November now.
God-damn my father and his selfish marriage vow renewals...
permalink That sounds expensive
and inefficient. California I mean, not your holiday idea.
permalink Yes, £700 flights
for 4 nights in CA.

I'm also going to be totally broken by the end of it.
permalink You are and it seems unwise.
Why are you going so far for such a short time?
permalink My dad lives in San Diego County,
and is celebrating his 25th wedding anniversary by renewing his vows.
He wanted me to come, but hasn't planned it with enough notice, or I'd have saved some leave and gone for 10 days.
I've only got 6 days' leave left until April 1st, so I'm using 4 of them for this.
I'm not totally on board with the idea, and I'm not exactly looking forward to it, but they'll only do it once, and one day I'll regret not taking every opportunity to see them.
permalink Tell them to take a honeymoon in the peak district
permalink This is actually a reasonably efficient way of discharging my
familial responsibilities for a while.
Having them stay with me for two weeks would not be...
permalink tell them to take a honeymoon in yorkshire
permalink My brother is getting married in Scotland
And that is surprisingly expensive. Basically my holiday for the year.
permalink You know what, there is very little I would not give to be normal.
The comfort of mediocrity and ignorance.

Normal people do not weep for the world, they do not despair at everything they see, they do not concern themselves with minutiae.

Why can I not just accept and enjoy life? I have wasted at least half of it already and for what?
permalink Do I not deserve the simplicity
of the reality of the naive?
permalink I'd argue that:
a) a "normal" person doesn't exist.
b) people you imagine to be "normal" aren't happy either.
permalink What's that quote
about everyone fighting a battle you don't know about? That.
permalink Then why bother?
Why continue this awful, hateful, pitiful charade.

What are we even for?
permalink Well, you've procreated and have wonderful kids.
So there's that.

I am however a largely pointless individual, but I try to take a certain pleasure in that frivolity.
permalink A lobotomy would do the trick.
Only stupid people don't weep at the state of the world.
permalink They are better off than we are
my dog is content. Why can I not just enjoy the now?
permalink Because you're not a dog.
And you can't lick your own testicles.
permalink *arf*
permalink To be honest,
they do not have to get much saggier.
permalink Well then
you'll have a here-and-now kind of hobby.
permalink He'll never go out again.
permalink from my perspectie i hope it's ery much an "over there.. no further"
kind of hobby.
permalink He's pretty far away already
unless he's doing it in Paddington station.
permalink Perhaps it's why he has such difficulty
with trains?
permalink I am in Moorgate.
permalink "Northern Line Bank Branch is suspended
due to a long haired man licking his own testicles at Moorgate"
permalink Is he doing it on the track???
permalink the electricity adds that tingle
permalink Electro urethral sounding?
Not on a school night.
permalink When I recommended CBT for your depression,
this wasn't what I meant.
permalink Cupping Bollocks on Track?

permalink Cock and Balls Therapy?
permalink hah! Yes
permalink I'm surprised more of you dirty buggers didn't know the acronym!

edit: despite being wiki, the linkie is NSFW.
permalink ah, good ol' Berk,
whatever happened to him I wonder? Probably nailed to a garden bench or summat.
permalink bloody hell that's a blast from the past
hope he worked it all out..
permalink I sometimes wonder what became of
old-skool b3tans, even Repcak and DJDirect.
permalink I did
I don't choose to partake though.
permalink C4mbodian
Bum Tramp.
permalink C4mbodians
Back Trump?
permalink You always have to go to far.
6" too far.
permalink When I was assessed for how mad I was
they decided I was VERY mad and needed a specialist as I was potentially a suicide threat (I am probably not, in reality)

So they put me on a waiting list for a specialist. Nothing has come of that these last 4 months. I guess it is a way to reduce waiting lists?
permalink have you checked your spam folder?
or called them?
permalink Yes
They said 'It may be some months'.

Actually, I'll see what they really said . . .

"Please be assured we will contact you as soon as we have availability, the wait may be a few months as it depends on how long each patient takes to complete their treatment."
permalink This is the nature of the NHS.
It's far from ideal especially when you're talking about people's mental health but that's the way it is.

Of course if this is private then you should be kicking buttocks and taking names.

I'm having an apostrophe crisis about people's.
permalink Persons'
permalink I keep thinking I mi's'sed the memo
when the apostrophe's usage was changed to mean here come's an s
permalink summing your life up.. you're pretty average
joined the army got married young had a bunch of kids
got a mortgage
doesn't like his job (who does?)
stop moaning about how average you are..
and get a haircut.. long hair doesn't make you different.. at your age it makes you look like a dick
permalink I got married aged 27, bang on the modal age for first weddings.
That is not young, not by any national or international standards.
permalink go camping https://www.theguardia...
or get a narrowboat and do the shroppie or leeds to liverpool
permalink Those things all look nice
but outdoor based activities in winter in the UK don't sound so much fun. Although maybe it'd be a good time to go to Cornwall since it'd be a bit quieter than normal.
permalink whoops i missed the winter thing.. embrace the snow
you've already done iceland so maybe norway or sweden.. or cheaper.. rhodes (greece) it snows there in winter and i'm guessing tickets are cheap that time of year
permalink Can get to Oslo for cheaps,
can't fly direct to the Greek islands at that time of year. Rome is cheap though, close to Sorrento and Pompeii...
permalink depends on how many days you want to put into it.. but a ferry trip in greece is fun
or getting a train to the boot of italy from rome is pretty cheap
and travel is within 1930's splendour.. just make sure you don't fall asleep or you'll get robbed
permalink Don't know if I'd go all the way south
but you can train to Sorrento as well.
permalink hardly any tourists (except italians)
and if you like a-spicy-meatball you're in luck
i still have a kilo of smoked paprika that i picked up in a market for pence
permalink Athens? Visit ludo
permalink I've become a convert to Majorca, it's cheap, warm and pretty in places
And well set up. Boutique hotel in the mountains?
permalink I've also heard good things
plus I know someone that lives there, although I don't know whereabouts.
permalink Istanbul's pretty cheap
although not warm.
permalink Istanbul is brilliant
But a complete bastard to get around.
permalink In what way?
permalink Traffic is horrendous.
It just takes ages to get from anywhere to anywhere.

Big chunks of it are very walkable though... and there is so much to see. Brilliant brilliant city.
permalink traffic (cheap taxis) is a bitch
and naughty people keep blowing stuff up..

edit: i really wouldn't go to turkey in the current climate.. but if you want to dice with death tunisia is there

oh! the canary's pretty much average temptature all year round
go somewhere like gomera or hirreo.. i went to gomera for nye/xmas it was awesome
permalink amy's back garden for the bbq then
i'm sure we wont play with alistairs bikes
permalink If you could see the current state of the garden
you would not be volunteering it.
permalink Also good cycling
permalink I like majorca,
not just because the san miguel is veh cheap over there.
permalink I too like Majorca
but weather-wise it's not really worth going before late April, unless you're a cyclist. Can be quite wet out of season too
permalink If you've got two weeks, why don't you go somewhere further afield
like India or Sri Lanka or Kenya or Tanzania. They'll all be warm that time of year and have various levels of comfort or roughing it depending on what you fancy.
permalink Sri Lanka's not too bad, about £500 each to fly,
but Nairobi's £1k. Too much when we're doing an expensive US holiday in September.
permalink Yeah, I guess it's peak season for Kenya then, hence the price
and you'd not want to stay in Nairobi but head for Mombasa or to a safari park but I guess neither of those are particularly cheap options. Sri Lanka could be a go though.
permalink mizemma it's lovely to see you back on the board
can i suggest that you C_I and maybe amy organise a bbq for a london bash (victoria park?)
cheeky i know but i'll bring pulled pork or something..
permalink That's very kind of you, Riggers
but I'm really only here as I have the week off and so have the time. Can't promise that I'll be around much once I'm back at work.
And I'm afraid that being on the organising end of a barbecue in the park does not sound like my idea of a good time. Plus I think the parks have banned those disposable bbqs due to the damage they do to grass.
permalink whoops
i replied up there ^
permalink But $10k a tiger isn't exactly cheap
permalink buy another tiger
and get the chance to win a leopard.
permalink TJ:
it's just occurred to me that this is my last working day intil a week on Monday.

permalink I'd like either a cottage in the middle of nowhere for a couple of weeks,
or I'd go somewhere I haven't been before, hire a car and go wherever the whim takes me, staying in hostels because we had an amazing time doing that an south Africa.

So one of those.
thread so today i've been offered a track day in silverstone by some shower screen people
and invited to 3 days in monte carlo paid flights and accomodation in the fairmont to meet suppliers.

i can't be bothered with either.

EDIT: I have taken advantage of the chocolate some kind soul has brought into the office though.
permalink I have not been offered any free fun today.
And the Northern Line shat on my from a great height (depth?)
permalink I take exception to that. While what I am offering is not free -
though I may well buy you a pint - it will definitely be fun.
permalink And it was!
Are you off to Westfield again today?
permalink ye gods,
I went down chez Duke Of Your Fingers last week to relieve him of an iMac before he left to live in Berlin, his building overlooks Westfield and I managed to get derailed and ended up in the wrong car park. This meant I had to walk through part of the shops at one end and I've never seen so many people in a shopping centre at 8pm on a thursday, the place was mental. Poverty? Not there...
permalink Horrendous place.
Emma secretly LUUUURVES Westfield though.

"Emma and Westfield, Up a Tree.. S H O P P I N G"

permalink Gotta have tactics,
the main one of which is, never walk down the inside if you can help it.
permalink Oh god yes.
The place does my head in.
permalink Igzaktly. This is what I was saying to Iain
but he wasn't taking any notice. Too full of beer and un-chips by then I guess.
permalink :)
I know this... That is my strategy too, on the rare occasions that I have to deal with the fucking place.
permalink And now I have the Pet Shop Boys in my head.
I expect witchy got many strange looks walking through Westfield with that funky new lampshade...
permalink haha :)
Oddly enough once I was inside nobody batted an eyelid, they did at the bus stop though. Maybe it was because once I was inside I'd organised it so it was cradled in my arm and probably DID look like a lampshade.

Looks great on the shelving with my VT100!
permalink I do not luuurve Westfield but I would be foolish
to ignore its conveniences. I also generally only do forays in and out from the side doors. Walking through it makes me punchy.
permalink Very much this.
It is a shed full of cunts.
permalink No I am not going to Westfield again today
I told you and Mike that yesterday but you both chose to ignore me and carry on bullying me about it :P
permalink You could go to the Shepherds Bush one for a change!
permalink What, the central line and then Westfield - absofuckinglutely not.
I'm going upmarket and heading to Canary Wharf. I don't get to walk through the Olympic Park which is one of the main attractions of Westfield, but the bigger Waitrose has the stuff I need. I guess I could walk to CW, but it's not exactly a picturesque route...
permalink Indeed it isn't.
Although there are a few good bits of modernist/brutalist architecture to admire en route.
Mostly though... Shitholes.
permalink By the way... I had a lovely evening last night.
Great to see you. Good chat.
permalink I did walk down there after all. So much building going on
still, not all of it is hideous and there are some surprisingly nice old buildings in Poplar.
And yeah, last night was great. Glad you could make it. We must do it again. And take our own chips!
permalink I'll take your trip to Monte Carlo
if you'd give it away ;)

except I can't, not right now anyway.
permalink But shirley you'd have to talk architecty-speak
how good are you at discussing flanges and pylons?
permalink Depends how much
Innuendo is required.
permalink I won't
take offence
permalink Monte Carlo would be cool
go blow the mortgage payments at baccarat.
permalink yes
permalink Christ almighty
Why? Aaaargh
permalink neuf a la bank
permalink I'm applying for a job back in the NHS
at the place I used to work for, being a Configuration Manager.

I'm not sure I want the job, but it's possible I could get it and that might get me a pay rise. Or a new job.
permalink Do you not like your current capitalist existence?
Or would you like to avoid the travel now you've an ankle biter?
permalink I miss the NHS. Decent holidays, better pension, better flexibility,
better investment in staff (training, etc), reasonable expectation that the whole company isn't working to the whim of the owner, that kind of thing.

But it's mainly so that I've a strong reason to demand my pay be doubled.
permalink you silly man